So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
It's not weird mascara. I just have puke crusted on my eyelashes.
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
i caught myself talking to a pigeon about my yeast infection.
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
I'm too socially awkward and sexually frustrated to get through this evening sober.
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
Randomize
