DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
He returned my car yesterday. Found a duffel bag with beef jerky, condoms, and a handgun this morning. Slightly concerned
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
He was like, I wanna take it slow. I took off my bra And I was like, either we have sex now or you get out.
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
Randomize
