worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
On my way home from Vegas. Just realized my pants are inside out
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
Right now I'm standing in front of my fridge, drinking wine out of the bottle and eating cold steak with my hands. I am THE BEST at being single.
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
Randomize