I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
So I'm pretty sure I fucked the dept of homeland security guy on my kitchen table. No recollection of it, but there are signs.
I can't believe we just used the phrase "jizz to juice ratio" in casual conversation.
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
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