I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
im just gonna lie here and collect money in this whoppers bag while sprawled out on this bench and explain that its to buy weed for my hangover
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
I solemnly swear I will not get your boyfriend puke in public drunk again
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
It's my birthday. I should be drinking mimosas in a top hat, not working.
She told me to take deeps breaths and I said I said YOU FUCKING TAKE A BREATH CAROL IM SURE IF YOU WERE IN MY POSITION YOU WOULD HAVE OFFED YOURSELF ALREADY and she said my name is Becky 😂
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