How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
He called his prostate his "boner button".
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
Randomize
