the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
Dad was on the deck drinking straight bourbon. He stopped, puked on his feet, and then continued drinking and talking about compound interest.
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
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