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ok, stay where you are, be there soon
watching a tv show about cocaine.. just explained to my mom why the test monkey chose coke over food
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
Sorry dude, one minute I was flirting with a bachelorette party from Dallas and the next I’m being tied to the bed by the bride
Trying to wrangle us an invite to the wedding
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
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