Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
Fact: Chilis at the airport in JAX will serve you shots of jack at 6:45 with breakfast. Ya I missed my flight.
So when does your new flight leave?
At my shot/hour ratio.... I leave in 16 shots. I love flying
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
FYI: telling a guy his dick is more impressive than you remembered it - they don't take it as a compliment.
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
"Offered to eat Froot Loops out of my belly button" drunk. Thats how drunk.
Randomize
