I am in a vortex of obligation.
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
Randomize
