Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
Ohh god. I'm so nervous. This is terrible. He just introduced me as "the best girlfriend of his life" and Jenny as his "sexual roomate"
Then she yelled something like "YOU HAVE SO MANY FORKS!" before collapsing on the floor
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
I've never heard "I will drown your mother in vanilla pudding" as an insult before, and then last night happened.
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
I'm actually more excited that I had so much sex this weekend that my ovaries hurt
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
Randomize
