Do you think if I drink bleach they will let me leave work?
If she catches me sniffing the seat of her office chair again, she's either going to fire me or fuck me
you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
I have eleven tally marks and an infinity sign drawn on my wrist in permanent marker. Senior bar crawl stole my liver.
waking up outside has become so normal, the paper boy knows to set the paper next to me
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
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