my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
You lured him into the bathroom with a trail of jello shots, then proceeded to barricade the door with duct tape. You really should have thought that one through..
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
after we were done she whispered to my dick "you sir, are a genius"
I guess all those years with her as your babysitter finally paid off.
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
I just spent an hour in the shower pretending I was a member of the b-52's. I can't go to work like this
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
Did you see her happy birthday to emily on facebook? The gist of it is like: hey emily you almost died at birth im glad you didn't. love mom.
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
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