i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
On a separate note, I just found out some condoms aren't vegan. Problem.
Hahahaha I can't wait for you to ask "wait. are there any animal by products in that?"
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
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