You're the end to all my bad dreams.
Did you have that reoccuring dream about me banging your mom again?
sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
just left a line of flour and citric acid on the dresser for my roommate to find. teach that bastard to steal my coke!
No he didn't understand the sequence...then I started texting him these texts with vagina strategically spelt correctly in jumbles of letters.
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
He said the last thing he remembered thinking was: 'Why is this vagina spinning?' Too drunk sex is no ones friend.
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
Randomize
