that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
It took me fifteen minutes to go from puking on my doorstep infront of my old lady neighbor to legit presentable person able to care for children. Bronzing powder and I deserve an award.
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
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