Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
Just come get me. Somewhere there's hobo that's going to want his dumpster back, and I kinda want to be gone when he discovers the vomit.
You had two tasks: \n1) put on a condom \n2) text me so I don't walk in on you \nIt really isn't that hard
HE LEFT ME THE DAY AFTER I LET HIM PEE ON ME. If you date him after that, I'll leave the fucking PLANET.
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
I'm armed with nothing but $4 lip gloss gum and my phone. Ready to take on the fucking world.
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
Randomize