i'm watching a show about a girl who died from masterbating with a carrot. A FUCKING CARROT, EMILY! YOU NEED TO BE CAREFUL!
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
she's googling pictures of Freddy Mercury and whispering 'I'm ready'
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
His 21st birthday is in the middle of shark week, it's meant to be.
You know being hammered seven days in a row can do serious damage to your liver.
Text me on Monday and make sure I'm still alive
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
"Nobody needs to know that I have a vibrating butt plug and nobody needs to know that I'm probably gonna start wearing it at work"
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
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