Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
Dude chill patience is a virtue.
WHY DOES PATIENCE HAVE TO BE A VIRTUE, WHY CAN'T HURRY THE FUCK UP BE A VIRTUE?
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
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