Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
Just wanted to let you know it's 3am and, at this point, I believe your sister has more of my semen in her than I do. So suck on that, fuckface.
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
It's fucking 2020, I should be able to watch Netflix in the buff while making brownies without you getting preachy about it.
Randomize
