dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
She's holding my hand. I'm going to kill myself.
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
That moment when your fucking in an airport bathroom and forget to lock the door. That poor man...scarred forever...
WEED IS MY SPIRIT ANIMAL
That one probably shouldn't have been in caps
I just had a flashback to us shaking up Gatorade mix and then inhaling it in your kitchen because it was funny. Now I can't stop laughing in work because that is the stupidest shit.
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
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