I love being friends with rich people. I get laid by association.
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
You really need to stop getting injured so often it's really starting to negatively impact my sex life. Oh and get well soon. . . no seriously though hurry the fuck up.
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
I miss painting strippers for Christmas. Holidays not the same without glitter and body paint
I'll be your substitute stripper tonight.
Randomize