I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
I'm gonna write a book. Almost Awesome: all the times I ALMOST got laid.
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
You took acid last night and I’m up early to go to the grand opening of a new TJMaxx by my house. We couldn’t be more perfect.
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
Randomize
