i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
So the girl I met at the bar last night came home with me. Played with my puppy. And left.
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
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