Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
Please don't call me names while I'm carrying your child.
I swear I have "I love assholes" written on my forehead with ink that only guys can see.
its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY.
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
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