i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
never play flip cup with pint glasses
Dude you just tried to have a one night stand with my ex girlfriend while we were trying to put you to bed upstairs.
but that still doesn't explain how i woke up on the couch down stairs.
I misunderstood what a threesome is. Please come pick me up.
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
Well, I found the missing blow... in my fucking suitcase... THIS MORNING. Yeah, I flew from FL to NY with blow in my suitcase yesterday.
I told you to check, dude
Yeah, AFTER I checked my bag and I was already sitting on a plane. Oh well. I figured worst case I'd do like 15 hours in county and I was totally prepared for that anyways. I always prepare for that when we hang out.
You were cuddling with an eight iron and I was eating a fajita completely ignoring your presence.
I'm alittle affraid you might be dead, seeing how your work party is in an hour and you haven't answered me? I mean I'm picturing you 1. Passed out in your car covered in fries or 2. On a boat in a box to Mexico covered in coke. Please let it be number 1. And aren't we going to your work party?
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
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