I just sold a pizza for the ability to listen to spice girls.
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
That reminds me...we need to get swords
FYI you just passed out mid-blow job. Consider this my letter of resignation.
Turned out the thing on the lampshade was a bloodstain, not a bedbug. We feel much safer now.
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
True strength comes from lack of pants
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
Randomize
