Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
Your roommates boyfriend just approached me while I was working to tell me about the staph infection he got on his face. Where do you find these people?
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
I'm in a corner eating carrots and drinking champagne. I've hit a new kind of low.
How is that low? I love carrots.
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
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