Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
Saw someone get laid in the bathroom no one was wearing shoes and I had a parrot on my shoulder...I never want to leave this bar
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
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