He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
Girls behind me in the library are trying to outslut each other with stories from last semester. I'm about to set my cock on the table between them and label it "tie breaker"
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
Was just told that I slept on the counter using a loaf of bread as a pillow. Clearly my life is going well.
I woke up wearing mittens dude
I woke up in my bathtub with the potted plant from downstairs.
checkmate.
Randomize
