I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
What do I wear to meet his family/put his dog to sleep? Is there even an appropriate outfit for this occasion?
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
She called his dick the colossus. I dont give a fuck if shes his wingman, I gotta see this natural wonder
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
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