ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
My dad is complaining about how his computer keeps getting viruses. I don't have the heart to tell him he needs to stop downloading so much porn.
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
you will always have a special place in my vag
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
The girl in line in front of me at the grocery store is buying wine, m&m minis, a toothbrush, and condoms. Is it inappropriate to high-five her?
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
I'm sittin in my Hawaiian shorts watching the office eating cold asparagus. wow do I suck when you're not here.
Randomize
