did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
TO ALL WHO WERE IN MY HOUSE LAST NIGHT: WHOEVER STOLE MY BONG AND PUT IT ON THE ROOF WILL BE PAYING MY HOSPITAL BILL FROM LAST NIGHT.. AND BUYING ME A NEW, SWEETER BONG.
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
I think the best part was the fact that the stripper's lock screen was a picture of the virgin mary
I'm ready to get married, then we can lie around watching anime and eating pizza while he rubs baby oil on me
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
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