And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
She asked if i could guess "what shape her carpet was". I got it wrong (christmas tree).
do you remember showing me a picture of your husbands penis last night?
yea! the mushroom one. i would only show you.
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
Randomize
