Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
It's either gonna be a cock in my mouth or a burger. You decide which.
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
I added our drug dealer to the quickbooks software babe, he is listed under vendor's as an expense category... money management is such a bitch...
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