Can we switch to phone sex? This is starting to get awkward...
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
Somehow i instagrammed my acceptance letter while blacked out. Then my grandma was the first to comment on it. I got over 50 likes....Phd here I come....
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
Randomize
