How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
I am stoned and watching Pocahontas. I am letting the kids eat whatever they want. I am the best babysitter in the whole wide world
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
You Just stopped dancing, looked at me and said "I'm gonna make it rain" Then shook the open box of crunch berries everywhere.
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
Randomize
