SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
i know i saw many looks of jealousy when i walked solo into subway carrying a cheesy gordida crunch after taco bell closing hours
I'm sure for most of the people, it was the one and only miracle they will see
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
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