he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
My goal for tonight: make tomorrow as awkward as humanly possible.
I was handcuffed to a girl for half-an-hour. And I'm still the only one in the house who didn't get laid.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
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