Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
I just saw a girl walking home wearing a tshirt, boxers, and cowboy boots. Thanks for having the decency to drive me to my car.
i feel like words won't express my appreciation properly so at some point i'm just going to bring you pizza then go down on you for an hour. fair?
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
Warning: at some point today you will probably see several pics of me 69-ing a blow up turtle show up on facebook. Just disregard them.
3 guesses about who had to still-drunkenly facilitate a fire drill at 2:40am because freshmen can't handle microwave popcorn.
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
OPIZZABONMYDICK
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
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