i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
People with herpes should wear stickers.
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
So hungover. They actually hid easter eggs around me.
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
Randomize
