my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
Last night drunk me texted a sure to be hungover me my class schedule and locations for today. I'm like a mom preparing her child for the first day of school
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.
I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
He's a Shit stain on my heart
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
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