you were crying and the really sympathetic homeless man offered you a sip of his whiskey. who was i to stop you?
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
When a bartender remarks "wow" on how quickly you've finished a drink... Is that good or bad?
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
I woke up in a bush somewhere in Tucson with a full suit on. Great way to end my birthday.
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
I learned the hard way a garbage bag will not save you when jumping from a tree at 2am
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