Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
Annabeth just got on the bar and slurred something about how she was worried that when she started dating you your penis wouldnt fit. You are one lucky bastard my friend.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
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