Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
Totally forgot I asked the cop for a theoretical fist bump and he still let me drive away
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
The adults are the big ones right?
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
Wakes up in a cold sweat at 3am, 136 unread messages and the preview on the notification is "I JUST GOT TO THE INCEST PART"
Randomize
