What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
Tornado booty call.. dedication
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
Randomize
