I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
I just spent a chunk of my Christmas money on Plan B. I don't think that's what my relatives had mind when they said "spend it wisely", but hey, it was a good investment considering the bad life choices i made last night.
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
Found my id. It was in the cats litter box. Seriously what was last night.
I just had to remind myself that I'm visible in real life. Sitting in the car in a parking lot, and almost took my shirt off because the tag is itchy and I wanted it off... and you know I don't wear bras...
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
Randomize
