are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
My underwear smells like fireworks.
Remind me to tell you the "if you give a mouse a special brownie" story when you get back
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
Holy. Crap. I just found a hickey on my bikini line. He never got my pants off. WHO IS THIS MYSTICAL HOOKUP WIZARD?
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
Randomize
