I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
I'm too hungover to crawl to the fridge so im eating the candy nipple tassels I got bought for Christmas
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
You called me your momma bear, and then demanded more vodka
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
