To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
You know how I know it's Spring Break? I just passed a car with "South Padre bound" shoe polished on the back. The driver was blatantly drinking a roadie and getting road head.
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
It's 4:30 AM and I just walked through a line of 10 deer without them freaking out. I am the campus deer king.
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
I pay 3K a month for rent, yet last nite I broke into the back of my building, scaled over 2 tons of garbage in heels and took a dirty freight elevator to my floor just so my doorman wouldn't see how fucked up I was
U know ur prob on camera right?
you said you were going to the bathroom. we found you an hour later laying in the backyard clutching a bottle of vodka while singing the beatles and crying
Randomize
