I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
Like reprimanding the wall for "sneaking up on me" drunk
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
Where is my rescue team. I keep hiding shit. And I'm trying to give out shots of olive oil
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
Real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch buck Rodgers in Tuesday.
Jesus Christ you're perfect.
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
My book, "How to Live With a Huge Penis" was delivered today. Can't wait to read it in public.
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
Randomize
