maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
She shows up drunk at 3am for sex and then punches me straight in the eye in the middle of it because "you're too nice."
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
My boss couldn’t find her phone so she asked me to call it and when I found it the screen said Fuck Toy was calling. I’m very much okay with this
Randomize
